Neysithe 26 let

Instead I created a reality that makes everything clear to them what they can do and not do and I created places for them to climb on. I saw, here is a child who needs to do a lot of climbing- so we turned the couch upside down and we put a little trampoline so they could jump to it from the desk and from that, climb on the upside-down couch. They created a whole playground in the house, in the playroom, or in the living room, depending on our living situation so that they could have their needs met. “Oh, the child is needing to climb on something and jump off something, how do I provide, rather than prevent?” (©paperhelp org) I provide a solution rather than set limits and say a lot of no’s, I go with a lot of yeses and a positive, “Oh, I see what you need. Here is your loving mommy providing it for you.” It doesn’t mean you provide everything and you never say no to anything, it does not mean that. It does mean that the child knows that I will make an effort to find a way to meet their needs. If  I cannot and it’s not possible, I’m still on their side, listening to their feelings, so I’m with them; like, “Okay, so you can’t get this, and this doesn’t work. You’re crying and I understand and I’m with you and I’ll hold you and you can cry as much as you want and you can tell me how you feel and what you wanted and I know you wanted the tower to stay up or you wanted to be able to jump on grandma’s couch and I guess grandma doesn’t.”